I haven’t posted here for so long that readers may have assumed I had quit. “Fearless” just couldn’t hack it!
I confess to being distracted since January. On April 1st after a 15 year battle with prostate cancer, my brother Steve died. I can just hear him chuckling over the ‘April Fools’ date. I started to write about him the next day; but try as I might, for weeks on end, I just couldn’t do it…
Thanks to Vreni for her moving photo
Since the age of 13, I’ve written at the drop of a hat — it’s how I process life. But since January, in a kind of suspended state, I have written nothing. Truth is I was avoiding my feelings.
One day over coffee with friends, a gentleman I barely knew casually asked how many siblings I had. It was the first time I’d had to answer that question and subtract Steve. It made me cry – which happened often in the first few months.
Now as the days and weeks pass, I am more able to have normal conversations – even speak passionately about an issue without it triggering tears. And now, a little something to post. I trust more will come. Someday no doubt I’ll even be able to write about Steve. But not yet.
I paused for awhile; and life does go on.
Thinking and Dreaming 
Great writing keep up the good work
Welcome back Pat!!! 🙂
I’m sorry to hear about your brother, but it is great to see you back.
My condolences and best wishes.
Thanks, friends! 🙂
It is good to see you back. Take all the time you need.
Thanks, Shelby … 🙂
Oh, I loved reading this post my friend. Pat, you’re so lovely. I want you to know that even in this short post, I felt more peaceful than I have felt in a while. Why, I don’t know. Maybe it was because I was reading something for the first time in a long time that I was personally invested in, a person I know writing about their feelings rather than just passing along an anecdote or a joke. Short though the post was, it was packed with thoughts to reflect on. It also touched me deeply to know that your brother’s name is Steve. I have a brother whose name is Steve. He’s a dear friend of mine. So, it was hard to digest your post without putting my brother in the mix.
I look forward to reading more Pat. Love to you Pat, from Jacq and Eric!
Shazam! 🙂 Love to you and Eric too, and have a beautiful birthday in Quebec! See you soon…Let’s talk about blogging for you!!